Satan Sues Paramount Over South Park

HELLFIRE & BRIMSTONE LLP
Infernal Counselors at Law
666 Gehenna Way, Suite 9
Lake of Fire, Lower Circle
July 25, 2025

Legal Affairs Department
Paramount Global
1515 Broadway
New York, NY 10036

RE: Formal Complaint Regarding Defamatory Portrayal of Mr. Satan in South Park
Episode Title: “Sermon On The Mount” (S27 E1)
Air Date: July 24, 2025

To Whom It May Concern (or whoever let this slip past Standards & Practices),

We are writing on behalf of our infernal client, Mr. Satan also known as The Morning Star, The Prince of Darkness, L-Diddy, Jared Kushner, The Old One, Steve Bannon’s Inner Monologue, and other names that shatter mirrors, cause dogs to howl in pain, cattle to miscarry, and birds to drop from the sky to express our formal and chthonic outrage regarding his recent depiction on your network's animated program South Park.

In the episode referenced above, your creators, those smirking meat puppets Matt Stone and Trey Parker (See you soon, Matt), have taken it upon themselves to portray Mr. Satan as the romantic partner of Donald J. Trump, in what can only be described as a grotesque mischaracterization and a flagrant act of character assassination (which, we remind you, is our job).