Zoom and Gloom: The Epstein Panic War Room
A leaked transcript from inside MAGA’s digital bunker
UNREDACTED TRANSCRIPT
LOCATION: Trump “PR War Room” Zoom Call
DATE: August 6, 2025
PARTICIPANTS: Susie Wiles, JD Vance, Kash Patel, Pam Bondi, Dan Bongino, Todd Blanche
[BEGIN TRANSCRIPT]
00:00 “OPERATION BAD TOUCH WAR ROOM” ZOOM CALL OPENS
SUSIE WILES (host, appears with American flag virtual background, her eyes already twitching)
Okay. We're on. Sorry for the inconvenience. I know this would have been easier in person.
Let’s mute unless you’re speaking. Todd, the pardon bribe has blown back on us. The Epstein files are bleeding POTUS drier than Melania on visitation day. Pam, enough with the Elle Driver eye patch. No one’s buying it.
